Just wasted a day of my life

Just wasted a day of my life going over my checklist on things to buy. Hoping that I can get everything from a single shopping spree I naively went to MidValley with high hopes of getting it over with.

Oh how wrong was my decision!

I should have known that there are probably things that I can get at the local grocery store where it WILL be cheaper, likewise I should have known that walking around MidVAlley alone is a… um… I should say frighteningly boring thing to do.

The way people looked at me when I browse in Watson (especially when they place facial soap and sanitary pad in the same aisle), people chatting away while I sit there alone eating my McBurgers, the way I stood in the check out queue at Carrefour holding a single torchlight and later not buying it at the last minute. Phew.. all this just freaks me out.

I should probably bring drag along my sis but the result of that would be me buying up everything on my checklist regardless of the price. Going out today, I basically went home empty handed.

Things at MidValley is (not surprisingly) way more expensive than getting it at your local store. And yet they do not stock up enough specialty items.

Among the things I need is some battery-less torchlights. Those that have a wire conductor coil that charges up an internal battery when you shake it. Also needed to find a pepper grinder for my spice rack someone gave for my birthday. Also worth mentioning that I couldn’t even find a simple magnifying glass no matter how many bookstores, hardware shop, hypermarts I went to. Those items just weren’t there!

So as I’m typing all this down, I’m making another list of things to buy tomorrow at the market, things I can get at the corner bookshop and things I can get from an online catalogue.

What a waste of time.

Top 10 Evil Villains

Source @ The CinemAttic

10. Agent Smith – The Matrix (1999), The Matrix Reloaded (2003), The Matrix Revolutions (2003)

“Mr. Aaaanderson.” Hugo Weaving’s calculated drawl made Smith the most evil computer programme since that shitey little paperclip from Word. Smith adds to the damning cinematic evidence that Artificial Intelligence is capable of nothing but pure, nasty evil.
9. The Wicked Witch of the West – The Wizard of Oz (1939)

This hell-ho is often labelled the modern archetype for human wickedness. For the purposes of this post, we shall label her: dagnasty wicked. She’s SO evil she even gave confused monkeys the ability to fly. IT’S NOT NATURAL!

8. Jigsaw – Saw (2004), Saw II (2005), Saw III (2006)

He may have never killed anyone directly, but the things he forces them through are horrifically nasty. He considers himself more of a vigilante than a twisted psychotic; but if you really want people to appreciate life, inserting keys in their eyes and taunting them with a creepy puppet isn’t the nicest way to do it.

7. The Joker – Batman (1989)

Jack Nicholson’s superb take on this insane maniac was a welcome departure from the super-campness of Cesar Romero’s Joker. Sometimes amusing, sometimes terrifying, one thing was certain; he was pure evil.

6. Nurse Ratched – One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1975)

The most wicked, horrible bitch ever to grace the big-screen. Feeding off the immortal power of head nurse, she shocks, abuses and humiliates the patients into doing her bidding. And she has McMurphy lobotomised! I’m quivering with rage even just thinking about her.

5. Michael Myers – Halloween (1978), Halloween 2 (1981), Halloween 4 (1988), Halloween 5 (1989)… (sigh)… and all the rest

“I met him, fifteen years ago,” says Dr. Sam Loomis. “I was told there was nothing left. No reason, no conscience, no understanding; even the most rudimentary sense of life or death, good or evil, right or wrong. I met this six-year-old child, with this blank, pale, emotionless face and, the blackest eyes… the *devil’s* eyes! I spent eight years trying to reach him, and then another seven trying to keep him locked up because I realized what was living behind that boy’s eyes was purely and simply… *evil*!” Enough said.

4. The T-1000 – Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991)

He may be an emotionless machine but he was programmed with evil intent and that makes him evil. And by Lucifer, he had the evil tools and intent for the job. Which made him scarier than the Austrian model. Being chased by the T-1000 would probably be the most opportune time to take up incontinence.

3. Norman Bates – Psycho (1960)

A psychologist’s dream,
Norman is utterly, utterly messed up in the head. Multiple personalities, Oedipus complexes and homicidal tendencies all attribute to a ridiculously warped and evil mind. He may be quite a tragic character, but it doesn’t detract from his nastiness.

2. Hannibal Lecter – Manhunter (1986), Silence of the Lambs (1991), Hannibal (2001), Red Dragon (2002), Hannibal Rising (2007)

“I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.” Cannibalism, murder and a keen nose for wine, Lecter is pure intellect and evil. The only villain who could remain terrifying behind three inches of reinforced glass, he kills for calm and calculated reasons. Utterly terrifying, utterly evil.

1. Darth Vader – Star Wars Episodes III (2005), IV (1977), V (1980), VI (1983)

The most evil villain of them all and the scariest boss in the galaxy. Disagree with most bosses, you might get a pay cut, disagree with Vader and you’ll be getting a fistful of Force down your throat. Vader destroyed entire planets without flinching, wiped out all the Jedis without batting an eyelid and even killed his beloved wife (through the medium of heartbreak). Forget the good that Luke sensed within him, that was merely the remnants of that pussy Anakin. Darth Vader was pure, 100% dagnasty evil. Even his breathing was evil.

 

Lord and the seamstress

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, Her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, “My dear child, why are you crying?”

The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.

The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls. “Is this your thimble?” the Lord asked

The seamstress replied, “No.”

The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a silver thimble
Ringed with sapphires. “Is this your thimble?” the Lord asked.

Again, the seamstress replied, “No.”

The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble. “Is this your thimble?” the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, “Yes.

The Lord was pleased with the woman’s honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water. When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, “Why are you crying?”

“Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river.

The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney. “Is this your husband?” the Lord asked.

“Yes,” cried the seamstress.

The Lord was furious. “You lied! That is an untruth!”

The seamstress replied, “Oh, forgive me, my Lord it is a
misunderstanding. You see, if I had said ‘no’ to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt. Then if I said ‘no’ to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said ‘yes,’ you would have given me all three. Lord, I’m not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT’S why I said ‘yes’ to George Clooney.

And so the Lord let her keep him.

The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it’s for a good and Honorable reason, and in the best interest of others.

That’s our story, and we’re sticking to it.

Signed,

All Women

Good and bad concept phones

Was looking at some phone brochures that got sent over my place, I can’t help notice that most of them have the appeal of a brick. Literally.

Have you wondered why are phones shaped like a brick? Last I checked my face don’t have a rectangle depression to fit it in.

All this talk about ergonomics means nothing to phone designers. There’s only 2+1 school of thought here.

If the phone are meant to be displayed for public eyes, it will not look like a phone. Serious. Who wants to stare at a phone anyway. It will be shaped like some sort of alien lipstick that does nothing to ease the action of making a call (think Nokia 7380). Otherwise it will be a brick. The better for you to hide the monstrosity in your pocket.

But then there’s a new school of thought for phone designs that sucks just as bad in terms of functionality. But at least they look great without people thinking you’re a martian. Hey.. you can’t fit much functionality on a wristband ok!

For example, a bracelet phone with MP3 support!

Looks cool and can get your wrist weighted down and tied up with all the metal and wires and headphones.

Then comes the mother of all brick phone concept: The CUin5

This baby got so many keys that they need to turn the rest of the 4 sets off when you press on the 5th set of keys. No screens.

Then comes some snake phone from Siemens.

Seriously, I think the designers are trying to one-up each other without thinking about their end users. Where do they think I’m going to put that? On my neck? I sure won’t put it on my wrist if it’s going to weight as heavy as it looks to be.

Onyx has some cool Hifi sets phones that is prone to scratches and dents the second you slide it in your jeans. Even combed cotton won’t help the fingerprints.

Not only is the phone thick (see how they angle the picture so you can’t see the thickness?) but it’s a waste of screen space. Such a small screen for such a big gadget. I won’t even call it a phone.

BenQ joined in the fray with the Black Box

Now this is slick, it’s dark, it’s wet, it’s confusing. Give yourself 3 seconds and stare at the phone. Now ask yourself, which button to press to make a call?

Behold the NEC Tag! phone. Which part of tag do you remember when you were a kid? Those snap on watches that has a measuring tape for a wrist band?

This is even worst that the Siemens snake phone. Reason being I can see the numpad! Look at your own wrist. Imagine this phone on your wrist and you need to make a call. You can’t even make a complete 90192321 *dial* without having to rotate the phone around your wrist 2-3 times. The keypad is too long!

..and I’m supposed to take it off to answer a phone with the entire (orange) top part flapping in the wind. The only solution is to buy this handphone and use it like a house phone like below.

With all the bad things I’ve said about phones and them being ugly, unpractical and just plain confusing. Surely you think it’s hard to please me. Well.. I like phones that are easy to use, are cool, have clean cut lines, dedicated buttons for major phone/camera actions, slim enough for a pocket and yet doesn’t feels like a paper.

To show you what I would like to have as my phone.. check out the Sony Ericsson phone below.

See what I mean. Don’t bother asking about the price though. If you need to ask you cannot afford it.

BCG Guy

Just earlier I had the unfortunate honor of speaking to our college blur case guy (BCG).
Just speaking to him will bring sinus and stroke due to the swelling of your brain caused by anger.

Not only does he looks elsewhere when speaking to you but he will attempt to derail even his own conversation.
Every conversation is a debate for him and he intends to win. Even if he’s asking for help.

Case study:
BCG: Do you know how to make a picture smaller?
Me: Smaller? As in size or dimension?
BCG: Just smaller so I can post it to the web.

*At this point I know it’s going to be a long conversation*

Me: Yea but you can make the size smaller so it loads faster or smaller picture so it can fit in a small area.
BCG: Oh.. smaller size.
Me: Ok, size is determined by things like noise, picture size and..
BCG: But the screenshot is clear and when I make it smaller it’s not clear anymore.
Me: Screenshot? Then just make the picture smaller or crop it la!
BCG: I tried resizing in Adobe Flash and it’s still blur. But is better than paint.
Me: Ms Paint?
BCG? No, Microsoft Photo Editor.
Me: But then Flash doesn’t handle pictures. It creates interactive files!
BCG: Can la.. I import the picture and can resize. Can make the picture size smaller.

*At this point I’m loosing my nerve with him. Wonder if he’s asking for help or trying to let me know that he managed to resize his picture in Flash*

BCG: But I cannot use the picture in web. They need Jpeg. So you know any way to convert it to picture?

*Notice how the conversation changed from asking to resize to asking for conversion method?*

Me: But you cannot make swf files smaller. Also Flash will resize your imported pictures to the working screen size.
BCG: But I don’t want to resize it.
Me: Look, you SHOULD NOT USE Flash to resize your photos. Just use photoshop to resize the picture and save to web la.
BCG: Flash cannot save to web meh?
Me: Cannot. SWF is not a picture file.
BCG: But I save in Flash earlier and can see the picture!

*WHERE THE HELL IS THIS CONVERSATION GOING? EVERYTIME I HEAR SOMEONE SAY “But..” WHEN ASKING FOR HELP IS A SIGN THAT THEY DON’T TRUST ME! THEN WHY ASK ME!!!”

Me: Serious, just use photoshop. It can do everything to resize a picture.
*Walks away..*